Oh and for a definition of what a vampire is, see http://www.stepheniemeyer.com/twilightseries.html and purchase the best-written books of your life!
1. His eyes seriously change from topaz to gold to dark brown (okay maybe not black, but close) depending on the day (nevermind that they also turn blue, green, and everything in between). They don’t go crimson red like some vampires, but that’s because he’s a “vegetarian” vampire, right?
2. His teeth are wicked sharp. Seriously, does he file those things when I'm not watching?
3. He likes to chew on my collarbone. Sometimes he tries to give me hickeys too.
4. Somehow his ice cold (slobber) fingers surprise me when I least expect them.
5. He runs faster than any other human I’ve ever tried to keep up with.
6. He can pull down and drag objects MUCH larger than his own size, including my ginormous diaper bag.
7. He is wise beyond his years. He learns things and NEVER forgets them (like the vampire photographic memory, get it?), like how to use the remote control to turn everything electronic on in the house or ways to open doors and run away quickly before anyone can catch him.
8. He is wicked strong. He can tear up every piece of important paperwork in the house and destroy all things left within his grasp.
9. He can dance like a banshee. It’s all in the leading, right?
10. He barfs up human food. What goes in, must come out. In Jack’s case, it often just comes right back up. Especially since he has the Uncle Tim syndrome and doesn’t know how to stop eating when he’s full. (Stephenie Meyer talks about how vampires barf up human food somewhere on her website, I promise I didn’t just make that one up.)
I thought this was cute:
Jayson used to come home from work and I would find teeny tiny sparkles on his face. It was weird. Then Jack used to get them too. I found out later it was something they'd pick up at Grandma Carpenter's house (not some mistress of Jayson's, which was my first guess). Jayson's younger sisters would sparkle up the bathrooms, which would then sparkle up my men. So, all of my men sparkle! So I guess the 11th reason why Jack is a vampire would be because he sparkles!
11 DAYS UNTIL BREAKING DAWN!! How can we get through the next week and a half? Any suggestions?